How To Get To Know People

How To Get To Know People

Do you find it difficult to get to know people? Are you wondering what you should do and not do when you meet a new person? Do you want to know how to get to know people?

If your answers to these questions are yes, then you are not alone.

No person is an island.

Hence, everyone needs to meet people and get to build good relationships with them.

Some people with great social skills make meeting new people and getting to know them an easy feat.

However, this can be tasking for people who do not know how to connect with others.

This is because they do not know the right things to do that will help other people open up to them.

If you are someone like this, then you just need to work on yourself.

Since we are here to help, as usual, we would be sharing some vital information that would make it easy for you to get to know people.

So, we advise you to come along with us.

We will begin by looking at the benefits of getting to know people…

Importance of Getting to Know People – How to Get to Know People

What are good questions to get to know someone

As we earlier stated, no person is an island.

You need people in your life to do different things.

Yet, some people still see no point in getting to know people.

This is wrong.

Hence, we would share with you some importance of getting to know people.

This would also serve as a motivation to build yourself to become someone who can easily connect with other people.

 To Build Strong Relationships

You cannot build relationship with a person if you do not know them.

If you do, you would find yourself trying to understand something they do, unable to deal with them, and getting frustrated about it.

In this kind of relationship, values will not be shared.

As a result, the relationship will not be strong and will probably not last long

To Know Who to Keep In Your Life – How to Get to Know People

Most time, when we meet people they seem like they are people who you would want in your life.

In other words, they will seem real to you.

However, once you get to know them, you would find out that they are people who will impact your life negatively.

When you get to know them for who they are, you most likely will not want them in your life.

This will make you take action to restrict your association with them.

To Meet Other People

You might have heard this phrase ‘a friend of my friend’.

This simply means someone who you know from another person.

We all need people in our life, and oftentimes, it is the people we know that introduces us to people who positively impact our lives.

If you do not get to know someone, you would not be able to build good relationships.

As a result, when you need help or connections to other people, they will not hesitate to help out.

Remember, the people you know can bring other wonderful people into your life.

It Exposes You to Different Points of View – How to Get to Know People

When you get to know people, it often helps you to see things from their perceptive.

As a result, it exposes you to different points of view.

You will become more open to different ideas and opinions.

When this happens, it will help improve your creative, lateral, and strategic thinking.

All of which can help you to be a better business person.

Dos and Don’ts When You Meet Someone New – How to Get to Know People

How do you get a lot of people to know you

As we earlier said, some people do not know the right things to do when they meet new people.

They find themselves doing the wrong things that can make the other party shut them out.

As a result, they are not able to make connections with people and know them.

This has to be corrected!

Therefore, we will share some dos and don’ts when you meet someone.

Don’ts – How to Get to Know People

The following are the things you should not do when you meet someone:

Don’t Be Cold

People do not appreciate or connect with others who are standoffish, cold, or extremely reserved.

So, when you meet people, do not be cold.

Rather, open up to people and show them who you are.

When you do this, they will be willing to share information about themselves.

Don’t Waste Your Energy – How to Get to Know People

You can meet people who are cold and reserved.

These people often do not open up no matter the nice things you say to them.

So, it is best to let them be.

You cannot get to know someone when they are not opening up.

We earlier told you not to be cold because it would discourage others.

Now, we are saying that you should not waste your energy on a conversation that someone else is not giving equal energy.

They probably want to be left alone.

Do not see it as something you did.

Respect their need to be alone.

When you do, it could probably make them appreciate you and give you a chance to know them.

Don’t Use Only Questions to Strike Conversations

Asking questions is a great and fast way to know things about people.

However, you need to be careful not to make questions the only basics for conversing with someone.

Asking questions should not be the first thing you do.

Some people do not feel comfortable being asked things about themselves right away.

So, learn how and when to ask questions.

Don’t Ask Questions Without Having Your Answers – How to Get to Know People

As we just said, when you know how to ask questions, you will quickly find out things about others.

However, you should not be so into asking questions that you forget to have answers to those questions.

This is because conversations are meant to be two-way, and most people would like to hear from you.

So, when you ask them a question and they answer, they would most probably ask you that question back.

If you do not have a good answer to it, they can get disappointed.

Don’t Ask Judgmental Questions 

As you ask questions during your conversation with people you meet ensure that they are not judgmental.

If your questions are judgmental, it can make the person either close up or lie.

Dos – How to Get to Know People

When you meet someone new, the following are things you should do to build a connection between the both of you:

Give Them Time

When we say give them time, we mean that you should go slowly with your conversation.

Make them feel comfortable talking to you.

Understand that several people are shy and not the ‘talking type’.

So, do not rush them with questions and serious conversations.

Try small talks first before progressing to serious conversations.

Listen to Them – How to Get to Know People

You have to ensure that you listen to the person you are conversing with.

This will show that you are interested in knowing them, and make them willing to open up to you.

Furthermore, listening to them attentively will help you not to miss any information about them.

Be Ready For Surprising Answers

When you do not know someone, you should expect anything from them.

In other words, as you speak with someone you just meet, be prepared to hear some surprising things about them.

Understand that new people can be anybody since you do not know them.

This is often the beauty of meeting some new; you know nothing about them yet!

Ask Open Questions – How to Get to Know People

For you to get someone you meet to open up, you should ask open questions.

When we say open questions, we mean questions that do not come with options.

For example, ‘do you like this product or the other product?’

When you ask a question like this, you often limit a person’s desire to speak in detail.

However, when there is no option in a question, people tend to explain their answers further.

So, ensure that you ask open questions such as ‘what product do you like?’

Tips on How to Get to Know People

Why is it hard for me to find friends

We have shared some dos and don’ts when you meet someone.

Now, we will be sharing some tips that will help you effectively put the dos into action and avoid the don’ts.

This will help you to connect and get to know people you meet.

1. Start a Conversation

To get to know people, you need to talk to them.

Therefore, when you meet someone you want to get to know, approach them and start a conversation.

When you do this, then you show the person that you want to get acquainted with them.

There are different means you can use to start a conversation with someone.

You can send them a text message or email, or chat them up on social media.

If you use these means, ensure that you keep it casual and light.

You can ask questions that you are sure that the person would respond to it.

If you do not make use of text, social media, or email to reach them, you can approach them and start a conversation.

At this point, ensure that you do not make it too personal, to avoid giving them the wrong idea.

2. Be Your Best – How to Get to Know People

People will be more open to you when you are put together and positive.

So, when you are with them, be your best, and respect them.

When you do, they will appreciate you for your effort.

Being at your best is not hiding who you are it is only ensuring that you do not chase people away before they get to know you.

So, make sure that you are encouraging and positive.

Let them be able to say ‘I like being around you, you lift my spirit’.

When you do all this, people will be comfortable around you.

3.  Be Welcoming and Friendly

People like being around a friendly person.

So, be friendly.

Smile, be confident and comfortable with yourself and be open to people.

This will draw them close to you, and make it easier for you to get to know them.

Some other things you can do to be welcoming are:

  • Make eye contact
  • Make use of open body signs to show them your interest
  • Avoid speaking negatively

4. Be Patient – How to Get to Know People

Understand that you cannot get to know someone well in a short time.

It often takes a while.

It is your gradual and continuous interaction that will help you get to know a person.

During this process, both parties will show or share mutual interests and respect, and get to know each others’ full and true personalities.

This will help to build a strong relationship.

So, ensure that you do not rush things.

Be patient!

Check here to discover three reasons why you should be patient in business.

How to Get to Know Someone Better

5. Share Your Interests

As we earlier said, during the process of knowing a person, you would share interests with them.

When you do this, you will get to know their dislikes and likes.

This will help you to get a hint of their personality.

So, how do you do that?

It is quite simple.

Let them know what interest you, and talk with them about things that interest them.

Make use of comments to start conversations and find out more about their interest.

Then go further to make use of their interest to do perform an activity together.

This will help to make your relationship with them grow.

For example, the person might have commented once that they love playing video games.

So, you can pick up that comment and say something like ‘you love playing video games? That is nice. I have never played well but I who love to play’.

You can also just ask them questions about their interests.

Also, you can make use of people’s interests to speak about yours.

It all depends on how you present it.

Buy into their interest, and share yours.

If you have similar interests, you can use that to build a mutual understanding.

For example, both of you might be interested in skydiving.

Then, all you have to do is talk about the peculiarities of skydiving, and probably go skydiving together.

6. Pay Attention to Them – How to Get to Know People

You cannot know a person’s personality and interests if you do not watch and listen to what they do and say closely.

So, ensure that you pay attention to them.

This will help you to know things that can help you start conversations with them or suggest engaging in an activity together.

Also, notice things about them and compliment them on them.

This will show them that you are interested in them, and keep your conversation with them going.

Watch their habits.

It will hint you about the kind of person they are.

7. Stay Independent

As you develop relationships with people, there is often the urge to spend time with them at all times.

However, you should restraint yourself from doing that.

You have to ensure that you stay independent.

This will show that you respect yourself and also the person’s space and time.

Do not be too available, to avoid coming off as being clingy and help maintain the relationship.

While you are doing this, ensure that you keep your relationship with them fresh by having meaningful conversations and exchanges.

Thankfully, there are technologies and social media platforms to do this without having to see them.

So, there will be no issue of growing apart while you stay independent.

8. Spend Time with Them – How to Get to Know People

Being independent does not mean that you will not spend some time with them.

If you do not spend time with them and engage in different activities with them, you might not know some things about them.

This is because spending time with them will help you to see different aspects of their personality or life.

However, ensure that it is not all the time you hang out with them.

Also, you need to commensurate the time spent together with the degree to which you know them.

For example, if you have known someone for a short while, then going on a vacation with them should not be something you should do.

Rather, you can take a day to engage in activities you both enjoy.

 9. Accept the Negative and Positive

Nobody is full of positivity at all times.

In other words, there are aspects of a person that are negative and others that are positive.

This is what makes them up.

So, when you have seen this part of them and believe that you can live and love them the way they are, then you should accept it.

Also, if they need help, do not hesitate to help

When you do, you would be able to get to know them better and build a stronger relationship.

However, for your safety and happiness, if you cannot deal with who they are, it will be best to cut them off or let them go.

This does not make you a bad person.

You should know your abilities and what you are getting yourself into.

10. Share Feelings, and Information – How to Get to Know People

When you have gotten to know more about someone, you can then share your feelings and personal information with them.

This indicates that you want to deepen your bond with them and build a trusting relationship.

However, ensure that you do not share all your feelings and personal information with them.

Ensure that you equate how well you have known them with the things you tell them.

For example, you should not share details about your love or sex life with them.

This is often something you can share with close friends, and not people you are just getting to know.

You can share information about causal personal things that do not hit too close to home.

For example, you can talk about your responsibilities in your company or your relocation to another state.

Conclusion on How to Get to Know People

stages of getting to know someone

Getting to know people is a process.

You have to ensure that you do the right things at all times, to avoid chasing people away from you.’

We have shared valuable information on this topic.

So, we hope it is of help to you.