How To Speak Up For Yourself

How To Speak Up For Yourself

Do you find it difficult to speak up for yourself? Are you tired of letting people have their way with you? Do you want to know how to speak up for yourself? If these describe you, then you’ll love what you’re about to discover in this blog post.

Inside here, we’ll be dishing out valuable insight on how to speak up for yourself.

First, What Does It Mean To Speak Up For Yourself?

Why do I have a hard time speaking up

Speaking up for yourself is the ability to speak boldly and honestly about your needs and rights.

People who can speak up for themselves are assertive and honest.

They do not allow others to disrespect them or disregard their rights.

On the contrary, if you struggle to speak up for yourself, you give people the opportunity to disrespect you.

You also allow opportunities to pass you by.

Therefore, as an individual – business owner, employee, etc., you have to speak up for yourself.

Specifically, as a business leader, you also have to be capable of speaking for other’s needs and rights.

In a nutshell, if you cannot speak up for yourself, you will find it difficult to speak for others.

This will inevitably translate to a lack of good leadership quality.

Why do you need to speak up for yourself, you may ask.

Let’s find out.

Why Do You Not Speak Up For Yourself?

How do you get better at speaking up

To become better at doing something, you need to identify why you are not doing it well.

This will enable you to find a solution and work to better yourself.

Hence, we are going to share with you the various reasons why people find it difficult to speak for themselves:

Negative Past Experiences From Speaking Up

Most people tend to get traumatized by what they experienced in the past.

This makes them close up and avoid certain things.

If you’ve had a terrible experience, e.g., ridicule speaking up over certain situations in the past, you might want to shrink in and close up.

Hence, whenever you have the opportunity to speak up, you will choose not to; to avoid further hurt or harm.

Rough Childhood Experiences – How to Speak Up For Yourself

People who have had tough childhood also find it hard to speak up for themselves.

Their self-esteem might have been destroyed due to abuses, ridicules, bullies, or other bad things.

If this happened to you, you would rather stay silent when someone disrespects you, even as an adult.

You might even start comforting yourself and thinking about how you have gone through worse situations.


Yes, as short as the word is, fear can crush the strongest of men.

When you are scared of what others will do to you for defending and standing up for your right and need, you might choose to stay silent.

Sometimes, it might be the fear of the things that would occur when you speak up.

Letting fear rule you will make you miss opportunities to get better.

Gender Difference – How to Speak Up For Yourself

Some people choose not to speak up because of their gender.

They avoid anything that will cause people to notice their gender and look down on them.

So, they choose silence instead of making their voices heard.

They find it hard to speak because of the ban and label attached to their gender – this is common with the feminine gender.

Concern Over People’s Opinion

Another reason why people do not speak up for themselves is because they worry about what people might think.

They fear that it might ruin a friendship, cause tension, or they may be seen as an agitator.

In conclusion, one of these reasons might be why you hold back from speaking up for yourself.

However, you should not let it continue keeping you silent.

You have to learn to speak up for yourself.

Here’s why.

Why You Should Speak Up For Yourself – The Benefits

How can I stop being scared to talk

‘Why should I speak for myself?’ you might ask.

Aside from the obvious reason, which is to protect your right, there are other reasons why you should speak up for yourself.

Let’s see them:

To Let Others Know Your Opinion

You need to speak up to let others know what your opinion, ideas, or thoughts are.

When you do not speak up, they assume you agree with them even when you might not.

Silence equals approval in most cases.

Above all, when you let people know what you are thinking by speaking up, they can understand you better.

To Show Your Strength 

You need to speak up to show your strength.

Strength is not only seen in people who are physically built and capable of lifting heavyweight.

It is also seen in people who can defend and stand up for their rights and needs.

Do not allow people to disrespect you and see you as a weakling

To Show Your Interest

You need to speak up for yourself to show your interest.

When you can advocate for yourself, you will not allow opportunities to pass you by.

Actively voice your interest in opportunities; do not be scared.

To Teach Others 

As a leader, you should be capable of speaking up for yourself.

There will come times when people around you do not know what to do about a situation.

If you know, you should speak up and direct them on the way to go.

Above all, when you speak up for yourself, you improve your leadership skills.

To Encourage Other

You need to advocate for yourself so that others can do the same for themselves.

As we earlier stated, when you’re a leader, what you do influences and affects others.

To Improve Your Self-confidence 

Another reason why you need to speak up for yourself is to improve your self-confidence.

The more you speak up for yourself, the more confident you become.

As a leader, you need to have confidence.

To Facilitate Good Mental Health

Your mental health is very important.

It affects your physical health and also your productivity.

When you keep things locked up inside you, it tends to cause frustration and tension.

These two things are not good for your mental health.

Hence, you need to speak up about things that are causing you to be frustrated and tense.

To Speak For the Greater Good 

Another reason you need to speak up for yourself is to speak for the greater good.

There are situations where you hate how things are being done.

This might not necessarily affect you directly, but you know that what is going on is wrong.

In this case, you have to speak up; do not stay silent.

To Improve Your Relationships

A relationship cannot be fine when one party keeps holding back their truth.

In your relationships, you have to talk to others about your dislikes and likes.

When you do not, you allow the other party to call the shots, which can be very tedious.

This does not make for a healthy relationship.

However, when you advocate for yourself, you create an opportunity for your relationships to improve.

When You Should Speak Up – How to Speak Up For Yourself

How do I gain confidence in my voice

‘Are there times for me to speak up and times to keep quiet?’ you might ask next.

The answer to this question is yes.

As much as you need to advocate for yourself, you need to know when to do so.

You have to ensure that you are speaking up for yourself because of the right reasons.

For example, when you speak up to bring down another person, you are doing it for the wrong reason.

Hence, we will share with you situations when you should speak up for both yourself and others.

When There is Disrespect

When you are being disrespected, you have to take a stand and stop it.

The best way to do this is by speaking up.

The same goes for when your employees are being disrespected; you should not let it stand as a business owner or leader.

Speak up to the person or people being disrespectful and let them know that their behavior is wrong.

Above all, do not allow yourself, your business, or your employees to be disrespected.

When Rules are Being Broken – How to Speak Up For Yourself

You’ll have some rules guiding your company or home.

Being the leader, you are the one to ensure that the rules are followed to the later.

When rules are broken, it is a disregard to you.

Also, it affects the company’s culture or the principles you’ve laid out in your home.

Therefore, when those rules are being broken, you have to speak up and set things right.

Do not let people disregard you.

When Nobody Else Does

There are times when things are going the wrong way, and no one wants to address the issue.

They might be bothered with the issues just as much as you are.

However, they’re not bold enough to speak up or choose not to address the situation.

You do not have to be like them.

Someone has to stand up for what’s right, and you can be that person.

When you do speak up, people who had it as a burden in their minds will appreciate you for doing that.

When There Will be Critical Consequence Should You Choose To Stay Silent– How to Speak Up For Yourself

Some things might seem okay, but being left unattended can cause a critical consequence.

When you notice such things, you should not let them go on.

Speak up about it.

If it’s someone’s actions, speak to the person.

Try to prevent a bad situation before it occurs by standing up against it and taking action.

When Your Intuition Tells You To

Oh yes! Your intuition can tell you to speak up about a situation.

All you have to do is to listen and adhere to it.

It will help save you trouble in the future.

For example, you can have a nagging feeling that keeps telling you that something is off about a situation.

Then, you have to speak up.

When You Are In Need – How to Speak Up For Yourself

You need to speak up when you need something.

Do not keep quiet and die in silence.

Approach people who can help you, then ask them for what you need.

However, when doing this, you have to be polite.

Tips on How to Speak Up For Yourself

What are the signs of speech anxiety

There are certain things you can do that will enable you to speak for yourself.

They will also help to make the other party listen to you.

Let’s see them:

Overcome Your Reason for Not Speaking Out For Yourself

You have to ensure you overcome the reason why you do not speak out for yourself.

If you do not, every other thing we share with you will be irrelevant to you.

First things first, you have to identify why you do not speak up for yourself and then work to overcome it.

For instance, if your reason is your childhood experience, you can see a therapist who will help you.

If your reason is fear, you have to realize that you cannot let fear rule your life and keep you stuck.

Whatever the reason is, you can work to overcome it.

Once you do this, you’ll see some improvements.

How do I regain my self esteem

Be Confident In Yourself 

The work does not end in overcoming the fears and reasons that hold you back from advocating for yourself.

You also have to be confident in yourself.

To be confident in yourself, you have to know your worth and strengths and be ready to care for yourself.

You need to value yourself to stand for your rights, needs, and wants while protecting yourself.

To do this, you can follow this method:

Do A Self-Assessment

Evaluate and assess how high your self-esteem is.

You can rate it on a scale ranging from one to ten.

If you are undecided, score yourself five.

Appreciate Yourself

The next thing to do is to appreciate the score of your assessment.

You deserve to be appreciated.

Also, forgive yourself if you got a low score.

It is not easy to stand for yourself; do your best.

Support Yourself

You support yourself every day as you go to work, eat well, have fun and pursue your goals.

Be determined to continue supporting yourself regardless of what you face.

Improve Yourself

Think of ways and things you can do to improve yourself.

You can start with something small and then move on to bigger things.

Be Courageous

For you to speak up for yourself, you need to have courage.

However, you cannot keep shut and wait for courage to come upon you before you speak.

Courage is not the absence of fear but the ability to take action despite your fear.

Courage comes as you take a stand and open your mouth to speak.

It comes as you are speaking your mind.

Defend and stand for your need and right, regardless of how scared you might be at that exact moment.

How can I control my breathing while talking

Know Your Right and Needs – How to Speak Up For Yourself

You cannot defend and stand for what you do not know.

Before you start the conversation where you demand your rights or needs, know what they are.

You can start by asking yourself questions and providing the answers.

For instance, if you want to fund your business, you need to know the amount you need and why you need that amount.

This will make it easy for you to speak to investors about the funds boldly.

Speak Honestly

You have to speak honestly when speaking to someone about how they treat you or when seeking something.

Always speak your truth.

Yes, this might make you seem vulnerable, but you need to let it all out.

When you do this, you have shown the person all your cards and relieved yourself of everything.

Above all, honesty also breeds respect.

How can I improve myself everyday

Do Not Get Too Emotional – How to Speak Up For Yourself

When speaking up for yourself, you might feel tempted to burst into tears or other intense emotions.

This is especially true when you have been hurt.

However, you should try not to do this.

Keep your emotions in check and be truthful.

Make your words clear, and if you have to, repeat yourself.

This will help the other party process your words and not react emotionally but truthfully.

Be Persistent

Now, there might be times when people keep brushing you off when you try to speak up.

This might happen a couple of times – sometimes more.

However, don’t let this discourage you.

You have to keep advocating for your rights, needs, and wants.

Make them know that you are persistent.

How can you tell a woman has low self-esteem

Learn To Deal With Daily Issues  

You have need practice to become better at doing something – practice makes perfect, they say.

Therefore, whatever you face during your day, learn to deal with it.

Speak up about it, no matter how minor the issue might be.

It could be to speak to your neighbor who blames you for what you did not do.

Or to speak to your landlord for not fixing what they said they would fix.

Practice speaking up more, and you will get better at it.

Final Thoughts

How do you love your self

The ability to defend and stand for your needs and right is something everybody has to possess.

It helps you to protect your right and speak up for what you need.

However, some people find it challenging to advocate for themselves.

If you are one of such people, don’t feel sad about it.

You can learn the art of speaking up.

To do this, you have to identify why you find it difficult to defend and stand for your rights and needs.

Once you have identified it, you need to work to overcome it.

You also need to be confident in yourself and be courageous.

When speaking up yourself, you have to be honest but not too emotional and know your rights and needs.

You also have to be persistent in cases where the other party does not want to listen to you.

Finally, you have to practice speaking up for yourself every day by dealing with daily issues.

All of these tips will enable you to speak up for yourself, provided you practice them.

So start today and enjoy the benefits of advocating for yourself…

Congrats to a newer and better you.

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How To Speak Up For Yourself