How To Build Relationships With People

How To Build Relationships With People

Have you been struggling with building solid relationships with people?

Would you like to learn the age-long secrets of forging the best relationships, especially as a business owner/working professional?

If so, then you are in the right place.

Whether you are trying to make a new friend, you’ve found someone you’re attracted to and want to begin a romantic relationship with, or you have just gotten employment in an organization.

Whatever the case, you should be interested in how to build relationships. 

Building effective relationships with people is one of the most challenging things to pull off for humans. 

There are a lot of reasons why it might be challenging to achieve this. 

Sometimes, the problem might be from you as an individual.

You are probably an introverted person/ business owner who finds it hard to interact with others, which might make forging relationships difficult for you. 

At other times, the issue might come from others.

Due to the differences in culture, tradition, background, environment where one grew up, e.t.c, building a good relationship with others might be a considerable challenge. 

That is why many people today are unable to forge these relationships successfully.

Sadly, even those who can manage to start some relationships are unable to sustain it.

In the long run, many of those relationships break apart. 

Nevertheless, we still have many success stories of people who could build lasting relationships with people effectively. 

This did not happen accidentally, and neither is it a product of luck.

A lot of conscious and deliberate work goes into building good and lasting relationships.

We’re about to show you how. Only stick with us until the end to find out all you need to know.

Understanding the Concept of Relationships 

When you hear the word relationship, what comes to your mind? 

Perhaps you think of the union that exists between two individuals who share a love interest.

You might also think about the mutual respect and collaboration that is present between employees in an organization.

It might even be that you thought of the friendship between you and your neighbors or other acquaintances.

We also have examples of business relationships.

Well, whichever one of the above scenarios played in your mind, you are on the right path.

The term relationship is a broad concept, one which covers every sphere of life.

Relationships have often been defined as how two or more people feel and behave towards one another. 

It is how two or more things or individuals connect. 

With that in mind, it is possible to have good relationships and bad ones. 

A good relationship is one in which the connection and collaboration between the parties involved are healthy and advantageous.

This is what people seeking to build relationships lookout for, be it in their personal lives or their career and profession. 

Unfortunately, though, not all relationships turn out to be good.

Some relationships do not turn out well and can be quite toxic.

Thereby affecting the mental and physical health of the parties involved.

Such relationships are the types people generally try to avoid falling into. 

However, in this blog post, our focus is on building good, effective, and healthy relationships with people.

Also, the principles we will discuss will apply to both personal relationships and professional ones.

Why it Might be Challenging to Build Relationships with People

As exciting and engaging as building relationships is, it is not an easy task for some people.

However, it is worth noting that some do better at it than others. 

We have many people who avoid trying to build relationships for specific reasons.

Likewise, others make efforts to do so, but it’s just not working out.

Do you find that you belong to any of these categories?

Well, find below some of the reasons why building relationships with people might be a challenge for you or others. 

Identifying the problems is the first step towards finding the solutions.

Having Trust Issues 

People with trust issues find it difficult to trust others.

There are several people in this situation. 

There are various reasons why a person might experience trust issues, ranging from a bad experience with trusting others or negative background and upbringing.

People with trust issues are unwilling to open up to others.

As a result, making it difficult for them to build good relationships with others.

Tight Schedule 

This applies especially to relationships that are forged or built in the workplace.

Building relationships takes a lot of time and attention from both parties.

Sometimes, you might not have this time to devote to it because of work demands and other things.

Forging relationships with your colleagues cannot be achieved by only spending time with them at work and in the office.

There is a better chance at this when you meet up with them at other settings after work.

A tight schedule would make such hangouts difficult, and so too would building relationships.

Lack of Confidence

Some are naturally shy or reserved and might shrink at the idea of starting conversations and connecting with others.

For such ones, creating and building a relationship with people can be pretty tricky. 

Those who lack confidence spend a great deal of their time alone and away from other people.

And when you do not spend time with people and engage them in conversations, getting to know them, it is hard building a relationship that way.

Personality Disorders 

Some personality disorders are also responsible for the difficulty that arises when trying to build relationships with people. 

A very commonly known one is paranoid.

Those who have paranoia are always overly suspicious of everything and everybody.

Due to this, they are usually cold and distant from others and find it hard to build a relationship with people.

We also have Schizoid personality disorder, which affects people with it so that they have a severe fear of being intimate with others.

They are more concerned about their interests and show little or no interest in other people.

This also makes it hard to build relationships.

Then, of course, we also have introverts.

These are just reserved by nature and prefer spending time alone than in the company of other people.

Such ones hardly participate in social activities and hence would struggle with building relationships with other people.

Expectations

Sometimes, our expectations of other people might hinder us from building a relationship with them.

Usually, every individual has specific values and standards that they hold dear and often expect that other people they interact with should share the same values.

Hence, when our expectations of others are not being met, it can make us disappointed in them and stay distant from them.

We see this play out many times in romantic relationships, especially. 

As you may have wondered since the beginning of this blog post; Why the fuss about building relationships with people.

Let’s answer your question.

Importance of Building Good Relationships with People

Many people believe that they do not need to have good relationships with others.

As we’ve noted earlier, some have had bad experiences with relationships, and others feel they are just better off being on their own. 

Well, granted, it is not compulsory to build relationships with everybody we come across.

The truth remains that not everyone is worth forging a relationship with. 

However, there are some people we come across, whether in our personal lives or career path, that building a relationship with them will be beneficial in many ways possible.

Well, firstly, building relationships is essential, especially in the workplace.

This is because it makes the best teams.

If you belong to a team in the organization you work for, you will understand how hard it might sometimes be to work collaboratively.

However, when you forge a good relationship with others, teamwork becomes easier.

Additionally, since good relationships with other people at work make teamwork easier, you can also rest assured that this would help to improve job efficiency and the results the team can produce.

Other Benefits 

Furthermore, as humans, we all need one another to grow and make great strides.

That is why building relationships with other people can help us make advancements in our professional careers.

One thing good relationships do is that it allows you make connections and network.

And of course, we’ve had a lot of experiences of people who were able to take a major lift in life due to the relationships they’ve built over time.

Also, when you devote time and attention to building relationships with people, it can significantly improve your life as a whole. 

People with poor relationships or none at all tend to have various conflicts which affect physical and mental health.

On the other hand, those who have good and healthy relationships do better in these areas.

With good relationships with others, you would always have people to count on when needed, fewer conflicts, and above all, excellent and healthy living. 

How to Build Relationships with People – Tips that Work 

What kind of relationship are you looking to build?

Do you want tips on how to build a better romantic relationship in your personal life?

Or are you more particular about forging great relationships in your professional career in your organization?

Well, whichever the case, the tips we will provide here will help you.

Note that building relationships with people isn’t always an easy task.

While it might come easy for some based on many factors, it could take time for others.

Hence, do not feel discouraged if you do not see results as early as you expected.

With consistency and effort, you can get better at building effective relationships. 

Here are some tips that can help you forge or build relationships with people:

1Be a Good Listener 

One of the main qualities of those who are great at building relationships with others is effective listening. 

Before you can forge a friendship or relationship with another person, you need to know them personally and understand their unique peculiarities.

This would give you a good idea of who they are and the best way to relate with them. 

However, it would be impossible to learn those things if you are not a good listener.

Therefore, consider your approach when people talk to you if you find it challenging to build relationships with people.

Are you more interested in talking than you are in listening? If yes, then that’s a problem.

Cultivate a good listening habit, and you will find that you are more prone to start good conversations, which leads to good relationships.

2Learn to Trust Others 

When it comes to building relationships with people, trust is essential.

The truth is that if you don’t trust others, you cannot have a relationship with them. 

That is why you need to keep an open mind to trust others more to achieve this. 

Granted, trusting others might be hard sometimes.

Especially when you’ve had bad experiences of betrayal, which makes you second guess others’ motives and intentions.

Such ugly past experiences might make you develop trust issues.

Nevertheless, you need to understand that not everybody will betray you, and not everyone will stab you in the back.

If you are going to build lasting relationships with people, either romantically or otherwise, you have to learn to trust others. 

3Create Time for Engaging Conversations

We know how busy our schedules can get.

You might be weighed down by many responsibilities that you feel you do not have time for other things.

However, if you want to build relationships, you need to make time to converse with those you seek relationships with.

Many times, this has been the death of a lot of personal relationships.

Those involved admit that a lack of communication is a significant factor responsible for either the failure to start such relationships or a breakdown along the way. 

Regardless of how busy or tight your schedule is, you need to make out time to sit and converse with others.

Such open communications go a long way in helping to build lasting relationships with people.

4Stop Being Judgemental

Could it be that building relationships with people is hard for you because you are too judgemental?

Being judgemental means being overly critical of others. 

In your interactions with people, you will learn a lot of things about them.

Many of their stories might be strange or difficult for you to comprehend.

Their background and culture might also be a far cry from what you know or have come to accept as a standard.

In such situations, it might be easy to get judgemental.

To build relationships with people, you need to avoid this negative trait.

Associate and interact with everyone with an open mind.

Do not judge people by their past, the way they look, or where they come from.

Doing this can help you better relate to them and have a good relationship with them.

5Show Personal Interest in Others

Humans, they say, are selfish by nature.

Well, even if that statement has an element of truth in it, you would need to break the status quo to build relationships with others. 

A selfish person who thinks about himself only will never make good friends or have enduring relationships.

This is because that trait tends to push people away from such a person.

Hence, to build lasting relationships with other people, you need to show personal interest in them.

Show them that they matter to you.

When having conversations, leave your problems aside and talk about theirs. 

Another way you can show others you care about them and are interested in them is to remember details about them that they reveal to you.

Regardless of how small that information is, ensure you keep it to heart.

Something as little as remembering someone’s name after a first contact can be the spark needed to start a relationship with such one.

6Show Respect to Other People

Without mincing words, you cannot be disrespectful to others and expect to build a good relationship with them.

People value respect a lot, as it shows them that they are valued and honored.

Especially in the workplace, is it important to show respect to others?

It doesn’t matter if these are your subordinates or in superior positions.

Respect, they say, begets respect.

Therefore, if you want to gain the respect of other people, then you need to also show respect to them.

In an organization with mutual respect, the relationship between the team members will be a healthy and fruitful one.

7Don’t be a Perfectionist

A perfectionist is someone who aims for perfection in everything.

Such a person believes that whatever they do or whoever they meet should give or exhibit the topmost level of performance and efficiency.

Are you a perfectionist?

If you are a perfectionist, then it would be hard for you to build relationships with others.

This is because people are imperfect by nature and will always fall short of your set expectations.

Hence, when this happens, the tendency is there to distance yourself from such ones.

The solution to this is to limit your expectations both for yourself and others.

Understand that you cannot do without making mistakes and that others too are not perfect either.

When you make allowances for the shortcomings of others, you are more likely to build a good relationship with them.

8Overcome the Fear of Rejection

The fear of rejection is yet another factor that works against building relationships with other people.

This fear makes you avoid trying even to build such relationships in the first place.

It might be a result of low self-esteem or past experiences of rejection.

However, to be successful in building relationships, you need to overcome this fear of rejection.

One thing that helps is knowing and accepting that not every approach you make to relationships would end in acceptance.

People have varying interests, and it affects the kind of relationships they start.

Hence, expect to be rejected sometimes, and when it happens, do not lose heart nor relent.

The good news is that you will find one that would be fruitful and enduring.

9Be Persistent; Strong Relationships Often Take Time to Build 

When it comes to building relationships with people, do not expect quick results.

Often, relationships that start quickly don’t end well.

The reason?

The parties involved didn’t give the relationship the proper foundation and platform it needs to grow and thrive.

Therefore, you need to endure and be persistent in your efforts to build relationships with others.

You need to understand that people also have differing personalities.

Thereby affecting how they open up to relationships. 

However, with persistence and consistency in your efforts and application, you can get the eventual good results of building a strong and effective relationship.

10Practice Teamwork

If you are more interested in working as an individual, you might struggle to build relationships with people, especially in the workplace.

This is because you are not exposed to others, neither can you learn anything about them.

On the other hand, teamwork allows you to see and learn firsthand what other people are all about; their qualities, strengths, weaknesses e.t.c.

Also, the more you know about others, the more likely you are to build relationships with them. 

Therefore, if you have people you wish to forge great relationships with, take the initiative to work collaboratively on projects with them.

This would help in building such connections. 

Bottom Line on How to Build Relationships with People

There is no worthwhile endeavor that has ever been achieved without help from other people.

It is no wonder that one’s greatest asset is not money or other resources but people.

That is why building relationships with people is essential on all levels.

Whatever the factors that make it difficult for you to build relationships with people, they can all be defeated.

With the right strategies and applying these tips, you can successfully build long-lasting relationships with people.